"At my Darkest hour. The noose is tightening from a lovers stash. Will I be remembered as bloated meat or a visionary. My ego keeps me hanging on and then there is fear, fear of the wreckage left behind. I do not feel that selfish for those left behind to pick up the pieces but they will carry on, carry the torch that slowly burns out with their memory, a foot note on a scribbled page of a tome never read but by sycophants who said they knew me when. What a punch line to a bad joke that went over he heads of the masses." Gidget Gein
As a result of this article, I got fired. http://www.newtimesbpb.com/issues/2004-07-29/feature.html I am now the enfant terrible of the Post Mortem World... Thank Heaven for little (dead) girls. xo, g g
I found the ORIGINAL story from 2004 that got Gein FIRED from The Coroners Office!! PRESS on the NEW Times Image to read the entire 6 plus pages..ENJOY
Tuesday, October 07, 2003
What's the worst that could happen? 20 year old white male apparent drug overdose checked out while at home enjoying a movie. Title of video found in VCR,
"What's The Worst That Could Happen?"
GEIN B.D. '03 - posted by GEIN @ 5:49 PM Thursday, October 02, 2003
10 seconds before a violent death 21-year-old white male Alleged self inflicted gun shot wound in the company of girlfriend Last words said before incident, “This thing isn’t loaded”
Classic
- posted by GEIN @ 12:38 PM Thursday, September 25, 2003
morbidly obese Morbidly obese means you are going to die from shoveling food into the hole under your nose. and guys like me are going to make fat jokes over your rotting corpse. Please be considerate and go on a diet before checking out of this mortal buffet. and when comitting suicide do it on the first floor or make sure there is an elevator near by. My back is killing me.
Thank you for your time.
on a more bizarre note, check out the musical meanderings of the Tiger Lillies http://www.tigerlillies.com sounds like ? tiny tim singing childrens songs from hell for tom waits as kurt weill conducts
xo,
the bagboy
aka gein - posted by GEIN @ 9:02 PM Monday, September 22, 2003
Tonight I picked up an unidentified female skeleton. This was the first time I actually had the pleasure of playing with such a voluptuously putrefied cadaver. Real life skeletons, lying out in the open like some sort of post mortem moon bathers are nothing like the ones you see in carnival spook houses. They are greasy blood stained automats that once held the sustenance for the local scavengers. The odor is not your typical decomp delight. It’s a cross between dirty week old meat and the aroma urine lets off when one consumes too much asparagus. It’s a sour dry protein stench. Not unlike a warm milk martini.
So, said bones are in the open next to a bus stop. How no one found this critter sooner is no small wonder. My job is to make sure nothing gets left behind. Every clump of hair, every press on nail, every capped tooth and so on. Into the bag it goes. The toe tag is connected to the toe bone, the toe bone is connected to the foot bone, the foot bone is connected to… nothing. We had to play jigsaw puzzle later at the shop.
More later…
- posted by GEIN @ 6:50 PM Sunday, September 14, 2003
First post/ Gein's Removals Archive 6/'03-8/'03 Greetings from the crime scenes, meat lockers and crematoriums of Sunny South Florida!
The "Removals" section is my take on a journal. During my time not creating, I am being Inspired partly by my job working for the South Florida Medical Examiners Office. This log will document these adventures and my musings on the matter
I LOVE THE SMELL OF DECOMP IN THE MORNING
08.01.03 -"Woke Up With The Taste of Decomp in My Mouth" -
I was rudely awakened by the sound of my 2-way radio squawking a familiar tune.“I’ve got one for ya’ when you’re ready” the ungodly voice at the other end says.I’m never ready for what awaits me. A 350 pound white male. Dead for what seams to be five days or so, by the looks of the maggots and other nefarious creatures. I can always tell when I arrive on scene it’s going to be bad. And by bad I don’t mean gruesome or bloody or anything of that nature. I mean bad as in a gooey, sticky stomach-churning, eye tearing stink the likes of nothing you can imagine!
Ok please allow me to digress. I know it’s going to be bad because all the police officers exit their air conditioned cars and greet me with that same smile that says, “ OK schmuck, I hope you’re ready for this one” followed by smirks and comments like “I bet you get paid a million dollars for doing this” I say “It’s not about the money” and make some sort of sideways glance. I proceed into the house with my partner who has not had the pleasure as of late to assist me on removing a decomp. Some guys have all the Luck.
Strewn through out the house as usual in these cases are the assorted Porno tapes. Titles like “Lipstick Lesbians” and “MooGooGuiPoon” catch my eye. It seems like porn is a close friend to the dead. I could get philosophical here, but I’ll spare you. Into the boudoir. Their awaits my fine weathered friend. It’s amazing what the Florida heat will do to a corpse. Skin inflated in sections like some sort of post-mortem party balloons. Face squished in and unrecognizable due to the fact that he had been laying on it for the past five days. The sound of flies’ wings buzzing a frenzied lullaby. Maggots being born into this world of hope and sorrow, making their womb out of a dead man’s chest.
In order to remove this fine fellow safely and securely, I must dress up in Biohazard suit. I look like some sort of deranged Oompa Loompa. With all the proper precautions taken we slide the meat into the bag. POP! He goes off! Luckily my funny little suit saved me from flying decomposing liver bile. In the bag, on the gurney, cover over the body. I’m out of here. Enough is Enough.
When I get out side I notice a spot on my tie that wasn’t there before. Damn, He got me.
Now I’m at home reading the label of a certain cleaning product. I see tips for removing grass stains, wine, oatmeal and even blood. But nothing for Decomposing Flesh. Damn….and I just bought that tie.
Xo,
GEIN aka the bag boy
June 28 2003 - "POWER SAW SUICIDE" -
I've just arrived home from working a scene where the victim committed suicide with a circular table saw. He was almost completely decapitated, except his spinal cord saved him from losing his head, so to speak. The detectives were all making the usual postmortem remarks. "He's a cut above the rest" etc... you get the idea. When I picked him up he reminded me of one of those bobble head dolls everyone is so fond of nowadays. That was my obligatory joke to the situation. Another strange thing I noticed at the scene. In his video collection next to his draining body, was a STRYPER (80's Christian Metal Band) tape. It just goes to show you, Christian Rock can be EVIL too!
xo,
GEIN aka the bagboy
June 27 2003 - "VEHICULAR CASTRATION" -
Hit and Run. Thirty Five year old Hispanic male. Trapped under the wheels of a fleeing car. Road rash. Multiple contusions and abrasions. Genitalia ripped from torso. Instant sex change. Vehicular Castration. I can't bear to say any more.
Rest in pieces,
GEIN aka the bagboy
June 26 2003 - " A HOLE IN ONE" -
Suicide on the golf course seems to be a trend down here. I guess when you have more putting greens per capita than you have schools, anything can happen. Anyways said victim decided to end it all on the nineteenth hole. Gun shot to the chest. Why do suicides aim for anywhere other than the head? Can you say open casket? I always think it's funny that even at the end, vanity still thrives...
xo,
GEIN aka the bagboy
June 25 2003 - "Night of the Assisted Living Dead" -
Nursing Homes and assisted living facilities are the worst! It always reminds me of the Springfield Retirement Castle on the Simpsons crossed with a George Romero movie. I know I should respect My elders, especially during their "golden years" But It's hard to keep my composure when I'm rolling a stiff through the facility and all these lost wrinkled hands attached to absent wrinkled souls are grabbing me left and right accusing me of everything from being their grandson to being the devil. Ah, Wonderful South Florida. The Elephant's Graveyard. God's Waiting Room. Put me out of my misery before you put me in the snake pits of the south.
xo,
GEIN aka the bagboy
June 23 2003 - "BED, DEATH, and BEYOND" -
Here's an idea... I'm going to open a one stop dying depot. When you're close to checking out, you can check into "Bed, Death, and Beyond". It will be a Hospital/Funeral Home/Cemetery. You'll have activities like "last dying wish", "death bed confessions", and "meet your maker meet and greet" etc... The possibilities are endless.
xo,
GEIN aka the bagboy
June 18 2003 - "N.R.A.(NeoRedneckAuschwitz)" -
Today at a Jewish Funeral Home, I was given lessons in embalming techniques. I realize this doesn't sound too exciting. The surreal aspect is that my "teacher" was a Gay Racist Mortician working in a Strict Hebrew Funeral Parlor. All the time when he was draining the blood out of some yenta and explaining the different types of Postmortem Massage Techniques, he was "bitching like a she-wolf" about the "kikes and niggers" There were definitely shades of Auschwitz. I don't know how someone listening to Barry Manilow and working so contentedly can be so Evil? Oh well, Long live the new flesh...
xo,
GEIN aka the bagboy
JUNE 13 2003
Friday night, the Thirteenth of June. The moon is full. I've worked a double murder suicide, teenage overdoses,a couple of N.C.s(natural causes) and it's only midnight. I guess what they say about a full moon is true. Oh, and did I mention it's Friday the Thirteenth? South Florida has a tourist season that runs from October to May. Local business thrive during this period. The Medical Examiners Office is no different. I call it "the dead season" It's now the middle of June and there seems to be no signs of slowing down. They can keep dropping like files for all I care,since I get paid by the body, a commission if you will. Respectfully.
